I’ve never really been afraid to talk about my skin disease. Truthfully, I’ve done everything I can to explain it but have only been met with people who fail to see the seriousness about it. June held our awareness week, and though I missed my chance then, I would like to take the time to do it now. I figured what better place to open the discussion than to the one place that I discuss everything else. I’ve struggled with the idea of how to not make it sound so gross, sadly though it just is. This disease isn’t pretty and I’m not going to try to make it out to be.
With the summer comes the grim reminder of the show I once waited for every Sunday at 8pm. This isn’t a short story at all. In fact, this may be the most passionate about a topic I’ve ever been or even considered discussing. If you haven’t seen the series, good riddance, truly. If you have, maybe you’ll remember when it all went wrong and relive the anger with me. I’ve been working on this post since March, so I’m not kidding when I say that I’m very, very passionate about this topic and show. I’m quite sensitive over it, to be honest.
There is a general warning about talks of rape, abuse of the three degrees (mentally, physically, and emotionally), and spoilers. But it’s been five years or more so whatever.
It’s not been easy for me in the last few years. I refuse to call it writers block because I’m not blocked from anything. If it were a block I’d stare at the page and wonder how do you do the typing and the telling of the story I don’t know yet. I’m doing the typing now so, no, there’s no blockage of any sorts. What I have is a fear; a giant phobia of releasing my creative writings into the world.
This isn’t me coming out, because I’ve done that repeatedly. I’ve pushed the discussion of my bisexuality on many social platforms I am active on but what does that mean for me in the real world? Well, no one knows. Or rather, they don’t care. I mean this in terms of respecting it, remembering it, accepting that this is apart of what makes me, me and imagine how hard it is to come out to people again, and again, and again.
Actually, it isn’t just my family that likes to erase this. It’s everyone. It’s common. It’s commonplace for the media to take the bisexual woman and instead of addressing her as such, they instead throw the shade of lesbianism or even the “hallelujah, she has a man” heteronormative narrative. I won’t begin on why, there’s google results for ages and even Google predictions that can do this work for me.
I’ve been dreading finishing this story because I’ve never been so in love before. Okay, Gone Girl really does hold a special place in my heart but that is no this. No, You is special. It’s a league of its own and hypnotizing like I thought it would be (mostly because Stephen King called it that and well, it’s also on the front of the book).